I have hired a hundred employees over the past decade. In need of an office manager, I had interviewed six people for the position. The seventh was Jasmin, an African American woman who had excellent references and an impressive resume. The interview went well. Jasmin had solid answers for all the interview questions. After consulting my business partner, we made her an offer before she left the building, and she accepted.
Jasmin’s first workday was on a Monday, two weeks after her interview. When she arrived for her first day of work, my executive administrative assistant, Jan, showed Jasmin her office and walked her through her responsibilities. Busy with entertaining clients, I did not meet with Jasmin on her first day of work. I scheduled a meeting with her at nine on Tuesday, her second day of work.
The next morning, Jan informed me on the intercom that my appointment had arrived., then showed her into my office. Jasmin was dressed professionally in a black jacket and skirt and a white button-down shirt. One of the reasons she was selected to be the office manager was her assertiveness. She seemed to control the room during her interview. “Good morning, Jasmin. I apologize for not being available to welcome you to the office when you started yesterday.” With a somewhat stern look, her reply took me aback, “Good morning, Mr. Stanton. Your secretary explained to me yesterday that your schedule was full yesterday. May I ask you to address me as Ms. Jackson?”
Wanting an explanation, “I can do that, Ms. Jackson, but may I ask why?” Ms. Jackson explained that if she was going to command the respect of the office staff, it was important that she not become too familiar.” Following up, “Does that apply to your boss as well, Ms. Jackson.” Her face tensed, “I demand respect from everyone, Mr. Stanton, especially from you.” My response was uncharacteristically aggressive, “That attitude seems a bit uptight, Ms. Jackson.” Even before the word finished leaving my lips, I regretted my rudeness, especially at this juncture when I should be building rapport with my new employee.
Ms. Jackson’s response was predictable, and very angry, “You have insulted me Mr. Stanton. I demand an apology.” I tried to walk back what and said, “I apology, Ms. Jackson. I did not intend to disrespect you.” She continued to push back, “But, you did insult me, Mr. Stanton, and your words are an insufficient apology.” I smiled at her, more out of nervousness than because I found anything humorous, and she took this as a further insult, “Do you find this situation funny, Mr. Stanton?” The meeting was getting out of control.
Until now, I was sitting behind my desk and Ms. Jackson was standing in the middle of my office. I hadn’t even stood to greet her when my secretary had brought her into my office for the meeting. Regretting that faux pas as well, I stood up from me seat and asked, “Clearly, we are getting off on the wrong foot. How can I make it up to you?” Correcting me, she said “Ms. Jackson.” Not realizing at first what she trying to tell me, I finally realized she was referring to protocol, so I said, “Yes, of course, Ms. Jackson.” I repeated myself, “How can I make it up to you, Ms. Jackson?” Her nonverbal response was curious as she simply pointed to a spot on the floor in front of her. At first, I thought perhaps I had dropped something and leaned over my desk to look at the floor. Finally, I realized she wanted me to come out from behind my desk.
Complying with Ms. Jackson, I stepped out from behind my desk and stood at the spot on the floor she was still pointing at. I felt a bit silly, as I was being treated like a pet. This was the first time we had stood together, and only now I realized she was taller than me, at least in heals. Perhaps that was the point she was trying to make. Feeling a bit intimidated, I asked a third time, “I would like to make up to you my boorish behavior, Ms. Jackson. How can I do that?” Her response didn’t afford much clarity regarding what she really wanted, “You can show me respect, Mr. Stanton.” I was blunt, “What do you want?” I had forgotten to address her correctly.
Her language and tone became more ascendant, “You can apologize by submitting to my superiority.” I was thinking to myself that she was pretty cheeky speaking to her boss like that, but I went with her lead, “How can I do that, Ms. Jackson?” Then she went full on dominatrix, “You can worship me, Mr. Stanton.” Not having learned my lesson, I started to laugh. My lack of respect triggered anger from Ms. Jackson.
What had been a verbal conversation up to now suddenly became physical. Ms. Jackson reached under skirt, pulled a pair of black panties to her ankles, lifted the front of her skirt, put her other hand on the top of my head pushing me to my knees, and then put the hand behind my head while pushing my face into her vagina. “Apologize now, Mr. Stanton.” In a state of shock, I mumbled, “I sincerely apologize for my disrespectful actions, Ms. Jackson.” When I finished my full-throated apology, she pulled up her panties and looking down at me said, “I accept your apology. I have work to do now, Mr. Stanton.” She turned, opened the door, and walked away, leaving the door open for my secretary to see me on my knees.